Friday, November 5, 2010

Breakup: Day2 (01:16 AM)

He sent me an SMS! He said sorry! He said he wants me in his life and his life is like an empty shell without me! He says he missed me!
Somehow, I'm still not able to smile. I don't feel happy about it yet. I feel like someone has given me a prosthetic leg after amputating my limb. I want to know the reason why he gave up in the first place. Right now I need to know the truth. That's the most valuable thing. Why did he leave me last night?
"If it's because of something that I said, I'll keep my mouth shut all my life ... If it's 'cuz you feel I will never be rich enough to give you all comforts, I'll get back after I have a huge bank balance ... If it's 'cuz I'm old for you, I'll wait till you are old as well" I told him. I need the truth before we even think of getting back together.
I have cried all day, all night till my tears are dry and there is no water in my body to produce them. I don't want to cry like this again. More than that, I don't want him to ever cry like this in his life.
It is 01:30 AM and I'm waiting for his message. My neck pains and I know tomorrow morning I will have a severe back pain. Why does he not reply now. Is he afraid to give me the truth. Does he think I will break down? I think I've crossed that limit of breaking down now. I will be able to take anything and it will not sink me any further.
I think the truth will never come ... What should I do now? Should I get back and pretend that nothing happened? Should I continue with my dreams again? Hope, magic, love? Or should I go to sleep and switch off my phone and wake up a dead man?

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