Sunday, April 4, 2010

Easter Gift From a Friend

One of my friends gave me this link as an Easter Gift:
Shirtless Indian Men

Thanks buddy. I'm not quite into the typical Indian looks though. Love the oriental looks :P

Taylor Lautner Is Hot, Wish He Was Gay

Some pics of Taylor Lautner for you guys. I know, I know, he's just too hot guys but sadly, he's not gay!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

The Guy Who Was Not Meant To Be

my dream guy
I've heard Colbie Caillat's Bubbly some hundred times today. Why? It is the caller tune of a guy I fell for pretty strong last year. He seemed like the perfect guy: sexy, sensible, hot and the right spirit. When the sun was still shining for us, we used to talk for hours together, he would call me even if he gots just a 10 minutes break and I just could not stop myself.
Then I don't know when things crumbled, we fell apart and it took us both around 6 months to get back together to being friends. He may not be the one, but I know he's special, very special in my life. Everytime I hear this song there is this anticipation of hearing his voice any second. I can listen to this song for a million times and live in those moments of anticipation forever. Happy Easter honey.

Coming Out Stories On Youtube

Here are two of the most touching 'coming out' stories I've found on Youtube. We, in India, may be far away from such courage but I know quite a few guys who have come out to their parents and close friends. I'm out to a few straight friends too but doing it on Youtube, Facebook or Twitter is just too scary right now for me. One of my close friend who's out to almost all close people in his life told me, "My parents deserve to know about me. Right?" I can't agree more but nevertheless it's a very tough thing to do. Love you Mom and Dad.
What's your story? Want to share with me here? Drop a comment or mail me at ryan.closet[at]gmail[dot]com.

My First Gay Party In Bangalore

gay party bangalore
I'm a closeted gay guy from Bangalore (my regular visitors already know!). When I came to bangalore a couple of years back from a small town, I had this larger than life image of the 'gay parties' that are supposed to happen in the metro cities. Bangalore, arguably, has the best looking guys in India and my expectations were quite high to say the least. It took some time to actually go to a party, reasons: I am more of a 'sit-down-and-read-a-book' kinda guy, I dance real bad (have improved a bit now though), I didn't have any gay friends here who went to parties, I was down right scared of police, family and friends finding out, etc. (I've come quite a long way since, this blog talks a lot about my personal life!).
When I got to attend my first gay party I made sure I had friends with me who were going for the first time too and there was my ex-boyfriend with me like a guide for both of us :P It was a hotel with a known gay reputation in Bangalore. We went on time which is not exactly what happens in most parties here, people come late and then beg the DJ to play 'one-single-last-song'. The host was a charming young guy who made me comfortable right from the start, his face dripping off a sense of responsibility and authority. I still remember the way me and my friend were sitting in a corner couch looking around at the people with shy excitement, a beer bottle in hand and trying to make it last forever. People hardly notice you if you are not exactly a model material, or dance really well or make a bold statement with what you wear or act like a slut. So needless to say that I hardly got noticed in the party. Towards the end I actually did two significant things - I danced and I 'almost' kissed a guy!
Since then things have changed drastically when right now I'm in a stage when there's a party in town and I have invites from some really hot guys and I've decided to stay back home and write this article for people who may not know me ever in their lives (I wish I could link this blog to my FB account or have a picture of me here).

The Closet Perspective

closet gay urinals
Being in a closet gives one perspectives that are quite out of reach of the usual straight guy or the genuinely open gay people. I do agree that it is depressing quite a lot of times. But, the closet guys get to know a few things that most people will never feel.
Let's say I see a typical hottie on the streen, gym toned body, chic hairstyle perfectly balanced on a chiseled face and smell of the freshest thing on earth (got ya thinking right, peaches are not the only fresh thing in this world honey :P). If I'm not in the closet I would ideally ask him out or give some sorta signs and let's face it, most sexy guys on the planet are straight, so pat comes a rude reply or something even nastier. But, when I'm this closet guy I can admire him as much as I want and yet have hopes of bumping into him in the next gay party!
The closet gives me a perfect way to make the sexiest guys around me comfortable with me even in the swimming pool or the gym! All you have to do is laugh at their dumb homophobic jokes at times and you will sail through without much trouble.